Songs to dedicate to your boyfriend, by what you want to say

Pick what you want to say first

Most lists of love songs are sorted by decade or genre, which doesn't help when you're holding your phone wondering what to send. Start from the message instead. A song that says "I miss you" lands very differently from one that says "this is us", even if both are lovely.

Songs for when you miss him

• "Missing You", John Waite. The singer keeps insisting he isn't missing her, and clearly is. Send it when you've both been pretending to be fine about the distance.
• "Come Home", OneRepublic. Slower and plainer. For when the distance has gone on long enough and you want to say so.
• "Somewhere Only We Know", Keane. About a place two people share. Send it with the name of yours.

Songs to say thank you

• "Thank You", Dido. About someone who makes a bad day bearable. Send it after he got you through one.
• "Lean on Me", Bill Withers. Warm rather than romantic. For the boyfriend who turned up when it mattered.
• "You've Got a Friend", Carole King. For the times he's been your best friend as much as your boyfriend.

Songs for when you're sorry

A song can open the door, but it can't do the apology for you. Send it after you've said sorry in your own words, or with a line that says it plainly. If you need help with that part, here's how to apologize to your boyfriend.

• "Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word", Elton John. For admitting that saying it out loud is hard for you.
• "Hard to Say I'm Sorry", Chicago. More hopeful: sorry, and please don't go.

Love songs that say "this is us"

• "Lucky", Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat. A duet about two people who can't believe their luck. Good for the early months.
• "Your Song", Elton John. About trying to find the words and settling for a song. Fits if you're not the type to say it.
• "Can't Help Falling in Love", Elvis Presley. Short and certain. For when you just want to say it.
• "Make You Feel My Love", Bob Dylan, best known as sung by Adele. For a boyfriend going through something hard.
• "Thinking Out Loud", Ed Sheeran. About growing old together. Save it for when you've been together a while.
• "All of Me", John Legend. Written for Chrissy Teigen before their wedding, about loving all of someone, flaws included. Send it the day he's been hard on himself.
• "Lover", Taylor Swift. About choosing someone for keeps. For when it's stopped feeling new and started feeling like home.
• "Die with a Smile", Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars. About wanting one person beside you at the end of the world. Big, from 2024, and very sure of itself.

Two songs that sound romantic but aren't

• "Every Breath You Take", The Police. Sting has said it's about jealousy and surveillance, not love. It sounds sweet until you listen to the words.
• "I Will Always Love You". Dolly Parton wrote it as a goodbye. Whitney Houston's version is famous, but it's still a song about leaving.

The same goes for any song you only know the chorus of. Listen to it all the way through before you send it.

How to send a song so he listens

• Tell him where to listen. Song links from most music apps start at the beginning. If the moment you mean is the second verse, say so: "wait for the bit at about 1:40". On YouTube, pause at that moment, tap Share and switch on the start time (on a computer it's the "Start at" box), and the link begins there. If your app doesn't offer it, add &t=100 to the end of the link to start at 1:40 (the number is seconds).
• Add one line of your own. "This came on in the car and I had to pull over and send it to you" says more than the song does.
• Send it when he can listen. In the evening, or before a long drive, not while he's at work.
• One song, not ten. A playlist is a lovely gift, but a single song with a reason is a message.

Three lines to borrow, with your own details swapped in:

If you'd like the song to arrive with a few photos and a note, a digital gift can play it for him. There are more ideas among the digital gifts for your boyfriend and on the just because page.